so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
