dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
