if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize