I wish I could punch you in the face.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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