woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
then he tried to convert me to islam
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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