I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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