im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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