thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
