Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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