I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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