it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
