It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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