Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
