It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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