Do you still have your period?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
