We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
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