I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
