I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I need moral support for this bender
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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