Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
