just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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