I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
