Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
