why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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