You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
