for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Alive.
So much puke
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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