guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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