oh god the rape fog is back!
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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