It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
