going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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