turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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