hell yes lets make some ravioli
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
