Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
