it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Damn victory sex feels great
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