I think scott just propositioned me for sex
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
as a side note pls kill me
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
