I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
