I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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