I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
