its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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