I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Randomize
