Don't you send me to vm
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
