i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize