New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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