She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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