Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
