did you get engaged???
You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
