I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
