This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
