I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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