i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
