the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
