I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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